Wednesday, January 25, 2012

I hate that you still matter......

Its those little artifacts of past interactions, past relationships, that you think should be gone by now..... but they just keep god damn hangin around!!! I mean, WTF...... when is that place not gonna be "that spot we used to go" anymore? When will the silly terms like "bed water" or "space phone" be flushed from my memory? When are they going to stop being cute and funny? Or, hell..... at least stop reminding me of the place I first heard them!? That'd be nice!

It doesn't seem to be related to the length of the relationship either. I've been in some long term relationships that seem as though they've left no mark, while other short term quick ones seem like they've stuck with me a lot longer. I guess maybe this blog post is a little premature, I need to do some more thinking about it, maybe talk it out more with some friends too. I just find it so odd, and to be really honest, so annoying that I can't seem to exorcise these little demons from my head.

Life has changed a lot for me in the past few weeks. Got involved in the business deal of a lifetime, made some great new friends, got back to taking care of myself.... both physically and mentally. I'm in a great place. I had lost sight for a while of the things that I really valued and what I actually needed to sustain my own levels of personally success and happiness.

The end of 2011 were some of the most stressful, crazy times of my adult life, personally and professionally and I def lost my grip a little. I knew going into it they might be hard and I consciously chose to step a little closer to the edge then I'm comfortable with knowing that the outcome could really benefit me greatly in the future. I hate to admit to being the pompous, arrogant, insanely ambitious, overconfident, and at times ego-maniacal prick that I am sometimes..... but it worked, and in the end, I'm so glad I did it.

So, here I am on at the footsteps of a path that only leads up from here, looking forward to a very positive future and a whole new life on a level I never thought I'd actually reach. However, if I'm starting a whole new life, why the hell does head insist on keeping you around........

I hate that you still matter.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

In with the new... keep the old too!

Deuces 2011! We out!
First of all, Happy New Year.... I know its been a LONG time since my last post. Lets just say, life got a little...... 'complicated' for a while. I decided I really do need to get back to putting my thoughts down in writing and broadcasting my bullshit to the world for most of you to not read. So here goes:

I know its a bit off my usual style, but I wanted to make sure that my first post actually started on a positive note. Normally in most of my blog posts I'm ranting and raving about something I hate, some dumb-ass that pissed me off, one item on an ever-growing list of shit in world surrounding me that I'm truly bored with, pissed at and feel like bitching about.

Soon to come will surely be posts regarding posts very possibly titled: (linked when they happen)
1) I hate that you still matter....
2) Hate the player AND the game!
and of course:
3) Are you stupid, or just stupid?!

Back to the good part now; In with the new... keep the old too! As most of you who know me personally can already tell, I'm a bit of a "friend collector". One of my favorite things of all time to do is meet new people, any and every way I can. Go to party, throw a party, go on a random road trip, be someone's +1 to a wedding or company event and I have to say: Lately, its been some of the best weekends of my life with some of the greatest new people in my life. The crazy part to me is that most of them probably don't even know it.

Its become an annual bash for me, my "Incidental New Years Eve" parties, and this years party with over 230 guests, one of the best DJs in town and at one of my all time favorite restaurants in town was PERFECT. I had people I see everyday there, 2 guys I met the first day I ever moved to DC over 7 years ago, and of course a bunch of new friends I hadn't met until that night! This has been followed up by subsequent weekends filled with birthdays of some of my friends, one of my newest friends, random gatherings of friends from out of town and while I've been dead tired from running around non-stop, it really has managed to pull me from the funk I've been in for weeks.

This past weekend was just the cherry on top I need to finish up getting my ass in gear for 2012. Friday night, after what was a pretty stress typical week in corporate hell, I had the perfect happy hour. With one of my friends who's managed to make that interesting transition from "drinking buddy" to one of my dearest friends. Met her and some of her co-workers out at a place right near my condo tipped back a few too many, met some great new people, relaxed, talked about work, love, families, priorities, money and of course, how the hell we were all gonna get home in the snow!

Saturday night.... now THAT was a night! I had like 8 places to stop by and somehow managed to squeeze in most of them, but will admit I definitely got sucked into one particular group of people! I had a birthday dinner to stop at, an engagement dinner to run through, follow by a PhD graduation celebration and yet ANOTHER birthday gathering at a club in DC. (yeah, I'm a sucker for birthdays) So, I found myself in one dinner, on to the next, in the car.... shot down to K. St. and that's where the proverbial shit hit the fan. Its rare to find a find a group of educated, intelligent, people who can cut loose have a great time. That are captivating, inviting and just totally comfortable to be around. I had been invited to stop in by an old friend (who's def one of the coolest people I know) and intended to make it a quick fly-by, take a few pictures, head out to the other party and be done with it..... but that much fun is hard to walk away from!

The story ends with a camera full of hilarious pictures from full of funny as hell moments, awesome conversation and all around great night with an awesome group of total strangers! Its exactly that type of interaction I needed to remind me that the effort I put in to meeting new people, creating these new relationships and always pursuing the chance to expand my social circle doesn't ever have to slow down. Even when I think I'm getting too old for it, or thinking there's something better I should be doing with my time, get a little lost in my own head...... a night like that is exactly what I needed to slap me back into reality, back into MY reality.

Onwards and upwards this year..... I've got a fake wedding to plan, another damn birthday of my own to get through, and hopefully a ton more awesome people to meet.... see you/meet you all soon!

I love you all, old, new, and even the ones I haven't met yet!